So it's just another wintery Wednesday night...home in bed, PJ's on, poodle snuggling, watching Sex and the City reruns...and this line pops up out of nowhere (well...out of the mouth of feisty, fire-maned Miranda)...and it got me thinking...
I mean, these days women earn their own money, fix their own cars, have the option of conceiving children without a man present...so what is it about the male species that we so crave/desire/long for? Boyfriends are great fun, don't get me wrong, but what is it that makes one crave them when they clearly have no interest in being around everyday...if they don't need our company on a daily basis, why do we need theirs? Why do days apart feel like years, and days together feel like hours? Why do they consume our thoughts; their every action, word and drunken slur subjected to hours of analysis, cross-examination and drill-downs involving as many ears as will listen?
I don't have the answer yet, but the Sherlock Holmes in me is most definitely on a mission to find out what makes his company my drug and why with every fix, however uneventful, I yearn for more...
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Letter to my 20 year old self...
Dear, sweet, naive 20 year old me...
We are now nearing the end of our twenties...one glorious year left! So I thought I'd take the time to take stock and tell you the things I wish we'd known nearly a decade ago...
1. It's OK to make mistakes...
Mistakes give us experience. They show us who we don't want to be, which in turn tells us who we DO want to be. Mistakes let others know we don't have it all together. When they know we don't have it all together, they expect less, and we fear disappointing them less. This gives us freedom to become who we were meant to be a lot sooner in life.
2. We don't have to wait for the perfect guy to start dating...
There's no such thing as the perfect guy...or the perfect relationship...or the perfect anything. Having fun and going on dates doesn't make us "easy" or bad...it all just adds to experience, and prepares us for the future. The future is tough...but keeping things in perspective gets us through. If they were strangers before, they can be strangers once more.
3. Love is not "Mr.Right"...
Love is being happy when you look in the mirror. Love is accepting your imperfections and knowing that the longest relationship you will ever have is with yourself, so you'd best get to loving you! Love is the puppy who licks your face after you've left him alone all day. Love is the parents who fork out hundreds of thousands of rands to give you the best education and a chance in life, only to fork out thousands more when you're 28 to allow you to follow your dreams. So love is not just having someone to spend the 14th of February with. Love is, actually, all around us...
4. The sooner you follow your dreams, the better...
Everything that has happened in life thus far has brought us to where we are now. But there is nothing wrong with following the dreams you've had since you were 12, rather than the dreams other people had for you or your generation. When you know your talents, nurture them, push them and live the best life for you.
5. Enjoy EVERY experience...
Most importantly, enjoy every phase of this fleeting life. One minute you're a teenager with not a care in the world but the report card not being up to scratch, and before you know it you're turning 29 and have nothing to show for your time but a few travels and a degree. Don't stress about what's to come, enjoy what's here, now. Before you know it, it will be a decade later and you'll be wishing you could go back and enjoy every experience with the naievety of the inexperienced 20 year old you once were.
We are now nearing the end of our twenties...one glorious year left! So I thought I'd take the time to take stock and tell you the things I wish we'd known nearly a decade ago...
1. It's OK to make mistakes...
Mistakes give us experience. They show us who we don't want to be, which in turn tells us who we DO want to be. Mistakes let others know we don't have it all together. When they know we don't have it all together, they expect less, and we fear disappointing them less. This gives us freedom to become who we were meant to be a lot sooner in life.
2. We don't have to wait for the perfect guy to start dating...
There's no such thing as the perfect guy...or the perfect relationship...or the perfect anything. Having fun and going on dates doesn't make us "easy" or bad...it all just adds to experience, and prepares us for the future. The future is tough...but keeping things in perspective gets us through. If they were strangers before, they can be strangers once more.
3. Love is not "Mr.Right"...
Love is being happy when you look in the mirror. Love is accepting your imperfections and knowing that the longest relationship you will ever have is with yourself, so you'd best get to loving you! Love is the puppy who licks your face after you've left him alone all day. Love is the parents who fork out hundreds of thousands of rands to give you the best education and a chance in life, only to fork out thousands more when you're 28 to allow you to follow your dreams. So love is not just having someone to spend the 14th of February with. Love is, actually, all around us...
4. The sooner you follow your dreams, the better...
Everything that has happened in life thus far has brought us to where we are now. But there is nothing wrong with following the dreams you've had since you were 12, rather than the dreams other people had for you or your generation. When you know your talents, nurture them, push them and live the best life for you.
5. Enjoy EVERY experience...
Most importantly, enjoy every phase of this fleeting life. One minute you're a teenager with not a care in the world but the report card not being up to scratch, and before you know it you're turning 29 and have nothing to show for your time but a few travels and a degree. Don't stress about what's to come, enjoy what's here, now. Before you know it, it will be a decade later and you'll be wishing you could go back and enjoy every experience with the naievety of the inexperienced 20 year old you once were.
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Time...
Time. To some it's of the essence. To some it's running out. To some it's the most precious gift ever given...and the most precious thing ever taken away. We all, every last one of us walking this earth, breathing this air, have been given the same gift, the same precious commodity. Will a day come where we will be accountable for how we have used this gift? Will we have to answer for the hours we wasted chasing the material possessions that gave us an air of self-importance? Will we have to justify the hours we spent in the company of idle minds and idle hands? Will we be asked to account for the time we invested in helping others achieve dreams and overcome social injustices?
Will a higher power deem our efforts or management of what time we had as futile? Will the mismanagement of our present under the pretence of "living in the now" affect how we spend eternity?
The older I get the more I realise the importance of sharing time, rather than passing time. The importance of enjoying the time we've been given in the company of people who lift us up, make us happy, share our laughter and tears, and make us better people.
When the sand runs out...we can only hope to leave this place the better for having had us...
Will a higher power deem our efforts or management of what time we had as futile? Will the mismanagement of our present under the pretence of "living in the now" affect how we spend eternity?
The older I get the more I realise the importance of sharing time, rather than passing time. The importance of enjoying the time we've been given in the company of people who lift us up, make us happy, share our laughter and tears, and make us better people.
When the sand runs out...we can only hope to leave this place the better for having had us...
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Harry's Crown Jewels take centre stage!
OK...let's face it...it was only a matter of time before the Royal Playboy's goods would be all over the net for girls around the world to ogle. But now that the time has come:
1) Has it lived up to all the anticipation/expectation? His rear is a little on the pasty side. He does, however, display a magnificent physique sans clothing.
2) He appears in these photos to be completely nude...sockless even. These pics were supposedly taken during a game of "strip pool", which begs the question... just how poor is his pool-playing ability???
3) He's just come off a royal tour of duty representing Her Majesty the Queen in the Jubilee celebrations, as well as representing Her Majesty at the Olympic closing ceremony. Perhaps he wanted to remind the world that the old, fun-loving Harry is still around, lest we mistake him for a serious royal...or worse...a grown-up!
4) And MOST importantly, while he obviously exhibited a clear lapse in judgement (perhaps aided by alcohol) by letting strange and random girls come up to his suite to play strip-anything...is that ANY way to repay the man for his hospitality...by photographing his naked ass and then posting it all over the net??? Yes he's a Royal, yes he's a prominent figure, yes he's a celebrity...but he's also just a guy who went to Vegas to chill and let loose (maybe a little too loose...he clearly needs to work on his pool game). Whoever he invited to party with him should have had the decency to party with him within the confines of the suite he obviously took them to for privacy...and if they didn't like what was going on, they should have exercised their right to leave and left him with his right to party...however little attire he chose to wear!
1) Has it lived up to all the anticipation/expectation? His rear is a little on the pasty side. He does, however, display a magnificent physique sans clothing.
2) He appears in these photos to be completely nude...sockless even. These pics were supposedly taken during a game of "strip pool", which begs the question... just how poor is his pool-playing ability???
3) He's just come off a royal tour of duty representing Her Majesty the Queen in the Jubilee celebrations, as well as representing Her Majesty at the Olympic closing ceremony. Perhaps he wanted to remind the world that the old, fun-loving Harry is still around, lest we mistake him for a serious royal...or worse...a grown-up!
4) And MOST importantly, while he obviously exhibited a clear lapse in judgement (perhaps aided by alcohol) by letting strange and random girls come up to his suite to play strip-anything...is that ANY way to repay the man for his hospitality...by photographing his naked ass and then posting it all over the net??? Yes he's a Royal, yes he's a prominent figure, yes he's a celebrity...but he's also just a guy who went to Vegas to chill and let loose (maybe a little too loose...he clearly needs to work on his pool game). Whoever he invited to party with him should have had the decency to party with him within the confines of the suite he obviously took them to for privacy...and if they didn't like what was going on, they should have exercised their right to leave and left him with his right to party...however little attire he chose to wear!
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
Life is but a series of good days and bad days...
Wow...what an incredibly awesome day I had today! Cleaned the flat, went to gym...had a really good and ENJOYABLE workout (say whaaat?!?!), cooked a delish pasta, took the pooch for a looong walk, prepared a radio piece, wrote an audition soliloquy and then did my absolute favourite thing in the world to do...watched test cricket (SA vs. Australia)! And then I came to this really important realisation...life is but a series of good days and bad days. I found such comfort in the simplicity of it all. Then I basked in the glory of my "Ah moment" and just HAD to blog about it...cos that's just what we do!
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Happiness is…
There are those who believe that happiness is a state of mind. These are generally the same people who subscribe to the ideology that it is the power of positive thinking that invokes a sense of happiness and contentment in an otherwise miserable existence. Then there are those who believe that happiness comes from achieving one’s goals, acquiring wealth and utilizing said wealth to realize the dreams one has nurtured since childhood – dreams of flashy sports cars, expensive and elaborately decorated mansions in affluent neighbourhoods, designer clothing and membership to the most elite country club. In short, the ‘top billing’ lifestyle that only a vulgar excess of money can bring. These people are usually the ones who would do anything to clinch the deal or get their hands on the largest piece of the profit pie.
Me, I believe that happiness is a secret your heart keeps. It can be likened to a coy young bride who reveals only the slightest glimpses of skin on her wedding day. She looks so beautiful, pure and attractive. This is not the type of attraction that leads to a one night stand…not lust. This is love, for a lifetime. He knows all that he could have when he decides to spend the rest of his life loving that girl. But he has to work for it, work for her affection. It’s the same way with happiness. It’s not a quick fix, a feeling we can summon whenever we are feeling like life has got the better of us. Happiness, you may be amazed to hear, is not a “pick-me-upper.” It’s in the moments we spend in the midst of good friends and good conversation, in the long summer days spent with family on the beach, in the hours spent showering our loyal and loving dogs with the attention and affection they so desperately desire and deserve for being there when no-one else was, in the lazy mornings we waste in front of the television in our pyjamas, eating a bowl of cornflakes. It’s in the loud, action packed Saturday afternoons enjoyed at sports bars amongst fellow sports fans, wearing our colours and watching our favourite teams battling it out on the soccer/cricket/rugby field for pride and glory and in the Sunday afternoon naps we steal after a big, greasy, indulgent breakfast. It’s in hearing an old song that transports you to a time gone by, or in seeing that the boyband of your high school fantasies has reunited to do another tour – except now they’re all men, balding and fat with no business claiming to be a boyband any longer. It’s in the Christmas carols that take us back to when we were kids, putting out milk and cookies for Santa Claus.
It’s in the everyday moments, and not necessarily in every momentous day. Happiness is there, inside every one of us. All we have to do is fine-tune the eyes of our soul to sneak a glance at those fleeting moments when our heart reveals a part of the secret…
Me, I believe that happiness is a secret your heart keeps. It can be likened to a coy young bride who reveals only the slightest glimpses of skin on her wedding day. She looks so beautiful, pure and attractive. This is not the type of attraction that leads to a one night stand…not lust. This is love, for a lifetime. He knows all that he could have when he decides to spend the rest of his life loving that girl. But he has to work for it, work for her affection. It’s the same way with happiness. It’s not a quick fix, a feeling we can summon whenever we are feeling like life has got the better of us. Happiness, you may be amazed to hear, is not a “pick-me-upper.” It’s in the moments we spend in the midst of good friends and good conversation, in the long summer days spent with family on the beach, in the hours spent showering our loyal and loving dogs with the attention and affection they so desperately desire and deserve for being there when no-one else was, in the lazy mornings we waste in front of the television in our pyjamas, eating a bowl of cornflakes. It’s in the loud, action packed Saturday afternoons enjoyed at sports bars amongst fellow sports fans, wearing our colours and watching our favourite teams battling it out on the soccer/cricket/rugby field for pride and glory and in the Sunday afternoon naps we steal after a big, greasy, indulgent breakfast. It’s in hearing an old song that transports you to a time gone by, or in seeing that the boyband of your high school fantasies has reunited to do another tour – except now they’re all men, balding and fat with no business claiming to be a boyband any longer. It’s in the Christmas carols that take us back to when we were kids, putting out milk and cookies for Santa Claus.
It’s in the everyday moments, and not necessarily in every momentous day. Happiness is there, inside every one of us. All we have to do is fine-tune the eyes of our soul to sneak a glance at those fleeting moments when our heart reveals a part of the secret…
Life is a funny thing…
I’ve travelled down this road in my mind so many times…visualizing every step of the way; every major milestone. I thought I knew how things would turn out, or at very least the closest possible permutation.
See as children we all have dreams, which turn into hopes by the time we hit high school. These hopes form the basis of goals when we embark on the university journey, and by the time we start our first job they’ve usually evolved into a checklist.
When I was a child I had dreams of being a doctor, or a politician, or a singer, or a Mickey Mouse Club Mouseketeer. By high-school, I had taken to idolizing the Mousketeers, but I realized I couldn’t be one…it just wasn’t going to happen. I was not a blond-haired, blue-eyed beauty queen wannabe from a small town in Texas, Arkansas or Louisiana…and I didn’t have a single parent bussing me around the American countryside to audition for everything and the Cat’s Pyjamas! So I studied subjects that would help me fulfil my hopes of becoming a doctor. By this point all my family and their family had caught onto this dream and harboured and nurtured and fed it every chance they got. I thrived on the idea of helping people and said the things everyone wanted to hear. School was never a struggle, but perhaps if I had taken subjects that I was passionate about, I may have been more inspired to study harder. Instead, I just plodded along and most of high school, as enjoyable as it was, is now a vague and distant memory.
I didn’t get into medical school because of a quota system to regulate the opportunity in a once apartheid-ruled state. So I took the next best thing – Biomedical Science. A year of plants, plants and more plants…NOT EXACTLY what I had in mind! After failing my Chemistry theory exam miserably (17%) to be exact, I decided to opt for laziness and went the route of a private party college, 3 hours of lectures a day…and completed my B.Com in Applied Economics.
Then I went to London for two amazing years but had to return to sunny (did I mention I hate the sun) South Africa thanks once again to the fact that I was born in this once apartheid-ruled state and I have no British ancestry.
After a few years of Marketing Communications, which I found frightfully enjoyable, I am now a Research Executive...go figure!
So now I am 27. A researcher, not a doctor. I still love to sing, but alas after 3 Idols appearances still not a famous singer. Where I once had dreams of being a beautiful bride at my winter wonderland white wedding at 27, I don’t even know one guy I would consider spending forever with (forever is a LOOOOOONG time). I don’t drive a Matte black BMW X5 with titanium spinners and blacked out windows. And I don’t live on a palatial estate with 15 bedrooms and a grass tennis court for a lawn in Kent.
So it begs the question, do there exist people in this strange world of ours whose lives turn out exactly as they planned? And if so, how do they do it? And if not, well…life is a funny thing, isn’t it?
See as children we all have dreams, which turn into hopes by the time we hit high school. These hopes form the basis of goals when we embark on the university journey, and by the time we start our first job they’ve usually evolved into a checklist.
When I was a child I had dreams of being a doctor, or a politician, or a singer, or a Mickey Mouse Club Mouseketeer. By high-school, I had taken to idolizing the Mousketeers, but I realized I couldn’t be one…it just wasn’t going to happen. I was not a blond-haired, blue-eyed beauty queen wannabe from a small town in Texas, Arkansas or Louisiana…and I didn’t have a single parent bussing me around the American countryside to audition for everything and the Cat’s Pyjamas! So I studied subjects that would help me fulfil my hopes of becoming a doctor. By this point all my family and their family had caught onto this dream and harboured and nurtured and fed it every chance they got. I thrived on the idea of helping people and said the things everyone wanted to hear. School was never a struggle, but perhaps if I had taken subjects that I was passionate about, I may have been more inspired to study harder. Instead, I just plodded along and most of high school, as enjoyable as it was, is now a vague and distant memory.
I didn’t get into medical school because of a quota system to regulate the opportunity in a once apartheid-ruled state. So I took the next best thing – Biomedical Science. A year of plants, plants and more plants…NOT EXACTLY what I had in mind! After failing my Chemistry theory exam miserably (17%) to be exact, I decided to opt for laziness and went the route of a private party college, 3 hours of lectures a day…and completed my B.Com in Applied Economics.
Then I went to London for two amazing years but had to return to sunny (did I mention I hate the sun) South Africa thanks once again to the fact that I was born in this once apartheid-ruled state and I have no British ancestry.
After a few years of Marketing Communications, which I found frightfully enjoyable, I am now a Research Executive...go figure!
So now I am 27. A researcher, not a doctor. I still love to sing, but alas after 3 Idols appearances still not a famous singer. Where I once had dreams of being a beautiful bride at my winter wonderland white wedding at 27, I don’t even know one guy I would consider spending forever with (forever is a LOOOOOONG time). I don’t drive a Matte black BMW X5 with titanium spinners and blacked out windows. And I don’t live on a palatial estate with 15 bedrooms and a grass tennis court for a lawn in Kent.
So it begs the question, do there exist people in this strange world of ours whose lives turn out exactly as they planned? And if so, how do they do it? And if not, well…life is a funny thing, isn’t it?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)